Sunday, December 29, 2013
Year End - 2013 in review
For the last few years, I have refrained from making "specific" New Year's Resolutions for a few reasons.
The first one (and main one) is that I never kept them anyway. However, when I was in twelve step and turned my eating disorder over to a "power greater than myself" I realized that my weight stabilized, the moment I let go of trying to control it - which meant that for 7 glorious years, I NEVER HAD to make that one big resolution "this year, I will eat well and lose weight".
Well, I stopped going to my meetings and figured I was "cured' and that I could "take over now" - well, of course, I am never cured and taking over was the most horrible mistake I could make - as the weight just started coming on again and has basically attached itself to me as if it were glued on.
I miss the days when my weight never changed and I didn't have to worry about buying new clothes to fit my "new" weight (up or down) or the fact that I always looked the same. I really miss the days of NOT having to make resolutions.
This doesn't have anything to do with books, but I guess as I review my year, I realize how much I miss just "letting go and letting God (or whatever you call a higher power in your life)"
So, my wish for 2014 is to believe, let go and let fate decide.
I wish all of you a safe and healthy fate in 2014.